Healing Your Relationship With Money: From Scarcity to Self-Worth
Unlearning financial fear, rewriting your money story, and reclaiming your power.
🌾 When Money Meant Survival, Not Security
For most of my life, money wasn’t a peaceful subject. It was pressure. Tension. A tightness in my chest every time a bill was due. I grew up watching my mother work two, sometimes three jobs, always just making ends meet. She taught me love and sacrifice, but our financial life often felt like a battle—one we were losing despite the effort.
As I got older, I unconsciously inherited those beliefs. That money was hard to come by. That no matter how much you worked, there was never enough. That asking for more meant being ungrateful. And as much as I tried to out-earn that belief, I still found myself in cycles of financial anxiety—especially after starting over in my 30s with two daughters, no savings, and a mountain of self-doubt.
But here’s what I’ve come to realize: healing your relationship with money isn’t about hitting a magic income number. It’s about learning to feel safe with money. To trust it. To trust yourself. It’s about shifting from survival to self-worth.
🧠 Where Scarcity Begins: In the Mind and Body
Scarcity isn’t just a mindset—it’s a biological imprint.
Research in neuroscience and trauma psychology shows that financial trauma can wire our nervous systems into a constant state of survival mode. According to a study published in the Journal of Financial Therapy, individuals who experience ongoing financial stress often exhibit symptoms similar to PTSD—hypervigilance, avoidance, and chronic anxiety around money decisions.
And as Dr. Joe Dispenza explains in Becoming Supernatural, our thoughts and emotions shape our biology. When we’re constantly thinking, “There’s never enough”, our brain memorizes that emotion, turning it into a subconscious habit that influences everything—from how we spend, save, and invest, to whether we believe we’re even worthy of abundance at all.
🌬️ Healing Starts with Safety
Before you can receive more, you have to feel safe with what you have.
This was a huge shift for me. I had to stop shaming myself for every financial mistake and start building safety in my body first. I began practicing somatic grounding techniques like deep belly breathing before checking my bank account. I paused to feel gratitude even if I only had $11.23 to my name. Because if my body believed I was always in lack, it would reject abundance—even when it showed up.
Try This:
Before you open your banking app, close your eyes. Inhale deeply for 4 seconds. Hold for 4. Exhale slowly for 6. Whisper: “It’s safe to look. I am learning. I am growing.”
This might sound simple, but it’s profound. You are no longer punishing yourself—you’re partnering with your nervous system to rewrite your financial story.
✨ Rewiring Your Money Mindset
Changing your money story means becoming aware of the beliefs that no longer serve you—and choosing better ones.
Here are a few I’ve personally rewritten:
• Old Thought: “I’m bad with money.”
New Belief: “I am becoming financially empowered every day.”
• Old Thought: “I always mess this up.”
New Belief: “I am safe to make mistakes and still succeed.”
• Old Thought: “I’ll never get ahead.”
New Belief: “Money flows to me in expected and unexpected ways.”
This wasn’t about pretending everything was perfect—it was about giving myself new scripts to practice. And as I practiced, my outer world started to shift.
💖 Budgeting Became My Self-Worth Practice
For a long time, the word “budget” made me cringe. It felt like restriction. Like punishment for not being rich enough to spend freely. But once I began viewing budgeting through the lens of self-respect instead of self-denial, everything changed.
Budgeting became a way to care for my future self. A way to honor my energy, my time, and my values. It wasn’t about cutting out lattes—it was about choosing how I wanted to feel when I paid my bills.
That’s why I created the Wealth Flow Budget Planner—a colorful, customizable budgeting system designed to help you plan with clarity, track with confidence, and spend with joy. Because when your budget reflects your values, it becomes a mirror of your self-worth.
🌿 From Guilt to Joyful Spending
One of the biggest breakthroughs in my financial healing was learning how to spend without guilt.
I used to feel ashamed for buying myself anything—like I had to prove I was struggling enough to deserve help or empathy. But I’ve learned that scarcity mindset doesn’t just steal joy from saving—it steals joy from spending, too.
Financial self-care means:
• Buying the good moisturizer without spiraling.
• Tipping generously and celebrating it.
• Saying yes to experiences that expand your heart, even if they don’t make “perfect financial sense.”
Because money is a tool. And sometimes the most empowering thing you can do is use it to support your wholeness.
🧘♀️ Tools That Supported My Money Healing
These practices helped me on my journey—and might help you, too:
• Daily Money Check-ins: Open your bank account without judgment. Just observe.
• Gratitude Journaling: List 3 ways money supported you today (even the small things).
• Scripting: Write in detail how it feels to live with financial ease.
• Books That Helped:
The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel
Your Money or Your Life by Vicki Robin
You Are a Badass at Making Money by Jen Sincero
• Soothing Sounds: Play wealth frequency music or affirmations during your morning routine.
Remember: financial healing is both energetic and strategic. It’s mindset and spreadsheets. It’s affirmations and aligned action.
✨ Explore More
- The Wealth Flow Budget Planner
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“I Am that I Am” - I am whole, worthy, and open to abundance. My past does not define my future, and my bank balance does not determine my worth. I am the author now.
